Right Or Dead?

My mother has many alternate forms of this phrase. Would you rather be right or dead? Would you rather be right or happy? Ultimately they mean the same thing, what difference does being 'right' mean if it comes at certain costs?

Yesterday in Minnesota we had a 'white out'. The snow amounted to little under a foot, however, the 21 mph winds and the lack of visibility made it difficult to see anything. Now I don't mean to sound harsh, but it seems when the snow falls common sense goes out the window.

I remember when we were living at our old house in Colorado and there was a HUGE blizzard. Every tv personality begged people to stay indoors, that police officers were having trouble responding to all the accidents and trapped individuals as it was. We look out our window and there is a woman stuck. She is outside her car, and we can see inside that there is a very young baby in the front seat. The woman is barely dressed for winter, let alone a blizzard, and her child was too young to be able to be out in cold weather for long periods. Fortunately some people came and helped her out, however, how dumb do you have to be to do something like that? What happened to a little common sense?

Last night a man in Minnesota died when hit by a snow plow. And while it is sad for his family and friends, I can't really feel sorry for him. Wearing a white coat when it's completely dark outside except the white snow is not a smart choice. In addition, crossing because it's your right away in front of a snow plow that has the snow flying up in front of it just is not intelligent.

Was it that important for the man to go across the street at that point in time? Could he not have waited another five seconds to cross afterwards? Did being 'right' mean so much that he had to die? Now I realize this sounds heartless and cold, however, it's survival of the fittest. If you aren't intelligent enough to stay on the sidewalk for two more minutes then you kind of get what's coming to you.

There are so many people in this world that die of causes that they have no control over. I think that for whatever reasons people need to accept that every decision they make has a long term consequence. Drinking absurd amounts of alcohol all the time slowly rots your liver and other internal organs. Driving incredibly fast and aggressive is unnecessary and can injure not only you, but others. Just because it's your 'right' doesn't make it less selfish. I have started to believe that individuals who do things to themselves without regard for their own lives or the lives of others should be treated last. That the drunk who drank away the health of his liver should be the last one on the list of organ transplants. If they care that little about their own well-being, why should we? Why is it our responsibility to care for you, when you refuse to care about yourself or others? Is it really so important to be 'right' or exercise your 'rights'?

What do you think? Is it more important for you to be 'right' or for you to be alive, healthy and happy? And if you choose 'right' please explain why.

It's The Weather, Stupid!

Those who live in Colorado love to talk about the weather. We've had days when it was a blizzard and then 10:00 am hits and the sun comes out and the snow is completely melted. Some of the wildest, most unpredictable weather is in Colorado they say. And I'd agree. Colorado-ans love to talk about the weather, how it's crazy, how it's too warm, too cold, perfect for outdoor activity, etc. But let me tell you, it was not until I moved to Minnesota that I learned how to hold a lengthy conversation completely about the weather.

When I started working my first job, I always found it difficult to find a subject that was an easy conversation starter that would engage a person for a short period of time. I finally started discussing the weather. While people in Colorado talked about the weather because it was something to talk about, Minnesotans LOVE to talk about the weather, comment on how cold it is, complain about how awful it is to drive in, and yet they never move. I mean, in Colorado, the snow will most likely melt before the next day. The rare occasion that we get 6 weeks of blizzard like conditions, we look back and gloat that we could survive and drive in that.

Things are different in Minnesota. Because the weather gets so poor so often, and because there isn't extreme sunshine the next day, to gloat about how well you braved the past storm just isn't fun. However, commenting every day on what the weather is like, how it's going to be next week and so forth is absolutely entertaining. I've never seen a group of individuals more excited talking about weather than Minnesotans, or weather (wo)men. ....

And now that I've written an entire blog about people talking about the weather, I've become one of those Minnesotans who can do nothing more than talk about the weather. Dang it!!!!!

Friends or Frenemies?

We've all done it. It's nothing to be proud of, and yet it's definitely something that is a part of life. We've hurt the ones we're supposedly closest to. We say hurtful things, we do harmful things, we say supposedly supportive things in a negative way. The question is, why do we do these things?

I've been on the receiving end as often as I've been the person doing the damage. And for the most part, the person who has hurt me the most I know I have probably hurt the most as well. This person is someone I would call a friend, and likewise. So why is it that we both treat each other this way? Why do I treat some of my 'enemies' better? I am honest and forthright about why I don't like certain individuals. Why can't I do that with all my friends?

I have a theory that not all good friends are supposed to become great, even best friends. That some people's personalities just don't work well together, that there will be certain people who claim to be there for us but will take a jab at us whenever the opportunity arises, and then we will do the same to them, and the cycle continues.

Do real friends hurt their friends on purpose? Or is this a sign that the two should not be friends at all? Could it be that there are unresolved issues, that the passive aggressive behavior stems from the lack of confrontation? Now confrontation seems so hostile, but it really derives from confronting an issue head on before it becomes a problem by being direct, honest, and open to change. That one actually cares about the outcome, the future, and wants to fix it rather than sweep it under a rug.

Confrontation is something that I would like to be better at, something that I think would allow me to have better relationships with every person in my life, my family, friends, etc. I was told it's a rite of passage in your 20's to learn how to confront situations and understand that it doesn't hurt people more, but rather the opposite. We all believe that telling someone that we don't like something about them is hurtful. But how much more hurtful is it to say cutting remarks to the person? Or talk about them behind their back? Or roll your eyes and sigh every time they do it? Worse yet, avoid spending time with them because that habit drives you up the wall?

My goal this year is to become more direct and honest about everything. I know at first some people are going to be hurt. And I do apologize for that, however, in the long run I think that having my thoughts, words and actions in allignment can only bring happiness and peace to me and hopefully those around me.

Bad Hair Decade

No, I'm not talking about this year, although a few of my friends would disagree. My hair and I have been in an on-going battle ever since I can remember (and apparently from some of the pictures my mom has, since before I can remember!) Some days I win, usually I lose. I will never be one of those people who has perfect hair every day. I don't have the time or the patience for it. And while my hair may not be perfect, I take solace knowing that I am not alone.

Saturday night, three friends had dinner and discussed the worst hairstyles of their lives. While these three friends had only been alive for less than 75 years total, there was more than enough bad hair moments to last thousands of years. My worst hairstyle (other than every other day I wake up) was probably when I was in elementary school. My Asian, stick straight hair, doesn't hold a curl unless forced, became as big as a beach ball. Two yearbook pictures in a row, I look like I was electrocuted. The source? My mother. She put sponge rollers in the night before while my hair was wet. While this should work wonders, she mistakeningly decided to brush it. Now, you think she would have learned her lesson and done things differently the next year? Oh no. By that time she forgot and by the time she remembered, I was already looking fried.

Now, I'm not sure which was worst, C or J's bad hair memories. C-fabulous wanted a bowl cut in elementary school. Begged his mother for a bowl cut (which by the way, almost every single Asian male in the 70's and 80's had one) and she refused, instead she gave him a flat top. You know, the really bad, really short almost army inspired hair cut. If I remember correctly, every single bully had that haircut....

J-money's hair was probably the worst. He wanted a mullet. His uncles had mullets, and he wanted one so badly. His mother let him have a mullet, but more of a party all over, with curly, frizzy hair, that was side-parted. He was the French poodle version of Celine Dion's child Rene Charles. And if you have ever seen Rene Charles, he is the creepiest kid in Hollywood. What is with these little boys with hair that's longer than most little girls? Suri has a cute bob, and Rene has long flowing Fabio hair. Something is wrong....

As for you, what was your worst hair moment? And when did it happen?

Who Is The Better President?

Lately I've woken up to the strangest dreams. The other night I dreamt that Britney Spears was elected President of the United States of America. That's right, Brit-Brit. Shaved head and all. What was even more unsettling was that someone was challenging her win, and that someone was Michael Jackson. Equipped with a surgeon mask to cover up the fact that the tip of his nose fell off, he crashed the inaugeration ball. Mayhem insued. Eva Longeria led a dance off against Eva Mendes and Charlize Theron was the judge.

Some might say that my dream was silly, and I'd whole heartedly agree. However, have we let the political system and Hollywood mesh together so much so that celebs are running for public offices (i.e. that Law & Order actor running for President) and public, political figures are becoming celebrities?

My question for you is, who would be the better President, Britney Spears or Michael Jackson. Please comment who and why!

Punch Pizza = Night of Laughter

I get it from my father. My love for food, and more importantly, the appreciation of a good coupon for great food. Last night 6 of us went to Punch Pizza in Highland Park, carrying in 6 different coupons. Buy one get one free. You would typically think, oh we can get a pizza for half the price. But not this group of guys and gals.

Unfortunately we had to take two different cars because there were six of us total. And right as we were leaving the Minnesota weather decided to act funny and spit wet, large snowflakes everywhere! After securing a rockstar parking spot, Lizzy, Tom and I waited while Lindsay, Jon & Jeremy struggled to find a place. Inside the world's tiniest restaurant, we were clearly the anti-family group. The group that has no kids and looks to be the kind of people you tell your kids to use 'earmuffs' around. Of course there was a group of seminarians praying before their meal. What were we doing? Saying "That's what she said" after every unintentional loaded comment.

Our waitress arrived and she could not look more disinterested in us. She wasn't rude in any manner, but you could tell she had no interest in us whatsoever. After we proceeded to order 10 pizzas for a group of 6, you could tell everyone in the restaurant (like I said, it was tiny!) thought we were crazy.

The highlight of my night, was when Lizzy asked Tom if he was going to use any of the shredded cheese. He said, maybe I don't know, why? Are you going to eat the rest? And did she ever. Truth be known, Lizzy could probably down an entire package of cheese (once shredded) on a large pizza or a bowl of spaghetti.....

Completely Undomestic

There are those women who are amazing at everything. I am not one of them. Unfortunately, my sister is. She can play multiple instruments, speak multiple languages, make amazing meals, is incredibly athletic and outdoorsy, can sew anything from her own outfits to my quilt. She's great at painting pictures, drawing, etc. She is basically perfect, and it's not really fair.

Today, the devil aka Chanel, ripped her toy to shreds. I decided to try and sew it up. Two ducks, two sewing jobs and twenty different finger pricks later. How can I barely fix this stupid dog toy without injuring myself? And the worst part, I'm not even doing it well.

So where do these women learn how to do everything? And have you noticed there are women who can do everything men can do and then some? Like I'm pretty sure my sister can rock climb as well as most men, serve a better dinner than most men, and can sew her own clothes better than most men (and women for that matter). How do you never hear of these men who can do it all? And even more importantly, are there men who can do it all like my sister? Or could it be that women might have evolved past men?

Single's Awareness Day?

Oh my favorite day of the year, Valentine's Day. It's much like New Year's Eve and Halloween. You build up expectations for what the night is going to be like and then nothing ever lives up to the amazing idea you have in your head. As a single girl, the best part about Valentine's Day is the really the anti-Valentine's Day bar nights, where they can go to the bar and know that everyone there is single, and looking for someone to spend the night with, even if it's just at the bar.

This Valentine's Day I will be spending the day with Kevin, Brady, Bradley, and oh yes might I add that that is my brother's dog, my nephew and my father, respectively. I will be babysitting two dogs, two kids and two parents. And to be quite honest, I think the dogs will be easy (kennels) as will the kids. It's the parents that will be difficult. Asking all sorts of pesky questions about my love life (which is obviously not flourishing), and bugging me about when I'm going to get married and/or have babies. Oy.

I can't wait until tomorrow is over, so singles don't feel alone, women in relationships don't feel disappointed, and men in relationships aren't worrying trying to get everything perfect so that they don't end up in trouble.

So for everyone who has someone special I hope you make sure they know you love them more than just one day a year. And for us singles, just look at this day as a chance to go to the bar and look for potential dates and friends, because all those obnoxious, annoying, in love couples are off doing something romantic. :)

Hope you have a Happy Valentine's Day and let everyone you care about know you love them.

Weight A Minute...

I, like most twenty something women, find myself two years out of college and finding none of my pants seem to fit. What's wrong with them? I mean, clearly I didn't gain weight so why did they decide to shrink? Errr.....Right. I remember reading an article in Cosmo saying the weight you will gain in your adult life. 5-10 pounds after high school, 5-20 pounds during college, and 5-15 pounds during your first job. I'm pretty sure I could not fit into my high school pants right now, even if my life depended on it. Time to start making some adjustments, right?

Wrong. Even when everyone else was making New Year's Resolutions and getting motivated to workout, I made none. Until one day, my big girl pants didn't fit. Every woman knows what I'm talking about, the skinny pants and the big pants, for days when your weight fluctuates. I started wearing more and more skirts and dresses to hide the fact that I could barely button my pants. How mortifying!!

Well fast forward another week and I'm at the local Target with my wonderful roommate, and she is looking at buying a yoga or pilates dvd. While she's deliberating between the two and asking for my very uneducated opinion, I perchance see this "30 Day Shred with Jillian Michaels" and convince her to buy that instead. 3 weeks of 20 minutes a day (4-5 days a week) doing the dvd and I'm finally fitting (and not struggling) into my skinny pants again.

So, for anyone who needs to lose a couple pounds I highly recommend it. Because a $14 dvd is so much less expensive than a new wardrobe (although less fun).

Walker After Hours Party

One of my favorite events that takes place in Minneapolis! I, unfortunately, will not be able to attend as my parents have picked this weekend to come visit their new grandson (NOT mine!) and I have the pleasure of driving them down to Faribault at 8 pm at night.

So in case you are reading and you've never been to this before, here are all the details for the very exciting, very fashionable event!

"What more could you want from a party? Walker After Hours celebrates the opening of Live Forever: Elizabeth Peyton, a comprehensive survey of the painter’s jewel-like, unabashedly emotional portraits of rock idols such as Sid Vicious and Kurt Cobain, as well as a host of other musicians, artists, and creative types. Join us for cocktails and complementary appetizers, karaoke by Arzu, tunes by Jake Rudh, a screening of the film Kurt Cobain: About a Son, a portrait making activity with a forensic artist, the ever-popular Party People Pictures- and all sorts of opportunities to see and be seen. "

For more details check out www.walkerart.org and my favorite place to skip to afterwards is definitely the Chambers' Red, White & F**cking Blue Bar upstairs.
I hope you enjoy it!!

The Devil is Chanel

A little less than a year ago I decided to purchase a Cockapoo puppy. While I thought I had thoroughly thought through this decision, there was much that I had not accounted for.

While she might be the cutest thing in the world, she is very well the offspring of Lucifer himself. In the past year my experiences with her include:

- Vomiting and 'doing her business' every car trip

- Chewing through 3 phone chargers

- Chewing up one wireless mouse and one regular mouse

- Chewing apart my mattress

- Chewing up most of my luggage, purses, backpacks, and one pair of running shoes, countless pairs of flip flops

- Doing her business in the hall after she had already taken care of that literally 10 minutes beforehand

- Chewing my checkbook, bills, cards, wedding invitations, etc.

But, by far, the most excruciatingly embarrassing moment of my entire life as her owner came when we were outside on the balcony of our apartment. It's summer time and I'm talking on my cell phone with my mother and Chanel had to come with me. So there are people walking by with other dogs, and she's fine. And then some people come biking along and she goes mad, starts barking and growling and getting all worked up. A few minutes later some kids go running down the street and she's looking over them, wagging her tail, tongue out and panting & excited to see all the new people. Within seconds an old couple with canes start walking by, and because they walk so slowly they've seen my bi-polar dog go from sweet and innocent to crazy mad just a few minutes ago. Seeing the elder couple she goes biserk, barking like she's being murdered. It's awful and it's mortifying because this couple just looks at me thinking, control your damn dog! The worst, by far, was a few moments later when a women in a full burka walked by our balcony. Chanel was not having it. She let that person know she did not approve of her at all. After a little observation, the common factor in all three victims were that they had some sort of prop with them. A bike, a cane or a full on headcovering outfit that Chanel did not approve of. Because I am not elderly, I do not ride a bike, and I do not wear a Burka Chanel did not know what to think of these things and went hysterical.

And low and behold a few weeks later some Hesidic Jewish men came to our door with their hats and ringlets and Chanel barked so loudly you would have thought she was a big dog. Let me tell you, she really doesn't like props!!